Up early in the beautiful Rocky Mountains, rode my scooter to Safeway and then to Starbucks. Sitting by the river with my I-pad, my double tall soy latte, and a egg white spinach wrap, I thought, "This is likely as good as it gets!" Time to hear the river, like Siddhartha, and think, just think.
Seems I have so little time to think anymore. I believe thinking must be a lost art, a privilege, a memory. We have noise everywhere and information overload. The TV blatts, the radio bleats, the clothes dryer beeps. Where did the silence go? What happened to solitude, mental processing, problem solving? How do we know our opinions when we don't have time to withdraw from the chaos and reflect?
Nobody is to blame but myself, but at times it seems as though the constant interference is out of my control. My husband likes noise; he needs the TV on in order to focus. While driving he needs talk radio blaring. If we are together, one of us is miserable. If I have my quiet, he gets antsy, and if he has his continual sounds, I am grinding my teeth.
We need change. We need a plan that offers solutions. We spend less and less time together, and that is a solution, but not real conducive to a close relationship. We could have separate offices, and that is an option, but that would require remodels, selling and buying furniture, and losing guest rooms. We could live in separate houses and only come together to sleep, but that would require buying three houses in the three cities where we seasonally live. We could divorce but that is a very poor choice because we really do love each other. We could set a timer and the noise could come on and off every 30 minutes, but I'm sure the ding would come right in the middle of my deepest thoughts.
I have tried to love his chaos and he has tried to tolerate my need for quiet. We both failed. We will keep trying. If I only had time to think, I'm sure I could figure it out. Any suggestions?
No comments:
Post a Comment